Adventures in Whoreland: webdating wednesday

Today, as I watched Sex and the City, I found myself wondering what the whole dating scene is all about. I've never really dated. I had a boyfriend in high school. Then I married him. After a split from the husband and a string of one night stands and friends with benefits, I got back together with the husband...which then ended after eightish or so years together. Then came the first actual boyfriend after the divorce. I wouldn't really say it was dating, so much as it was a string of nights at the bar and weekends in bed in hibernation from my friends. A rookie mistake, one that I hope to never make again. Apparently he didn't like going out in public with me...because then he couldn't find other girls to date. After him, I had a non-boyfriend. A guy who didn't spoil me like I'm used to and most definitely didn't take my shit. He was nice, caring and real good in bed. But in general, he was a little much to handle out in the real world and my friends didn't like him. Both "relationships" lasted about months.

Now all I'm left with are two friends with benefits, who have, as of late, been more friend and lacking in the benefit department. Frustrating as it is, I'm trying to deal with it. Those that know me well know that I am not one to go through "droughts", so to speak. I can say, however, that I'm dealing with it pretty well...regardless of the sometimes complaining I do while intoxicated. It also helps that in my free time (read: being a bum) my perusal of the daily "casual encounters" ads on Craigslist helps me to see that there are a lot of crazies in this world...I mean, I've met about half of them, but they were no where near as crazy as some of these guys.

Take for instance exhibit A:

wanna play war?

Reply to:
Date: 2007-11-02, 8:16AM MST


I lay down and you blow the fuck out of me!

I wonder if he actually got any responses to that. And if he did, just who are these women that would actually stoop down to this level of anonynemity. Not anyone I know.

Then there's someone like this next example. I had to pick two because they both just took my breath away...I laughed so hard.

Trade shopping spree for breast milk.... - 39

Reply to:
Date: 2007-11-01, 4:52PM MST


Hi - I will treat you to a shopping spree at the mall in exchange for breast milk - you would be an attractive and clean single mom with large breasts ( really large ) race, weight, age un-important - but please be someone that takes care of herself.
Email for details...

Do you think he has mommy issues? You know Freud himself would have a field day with this one. There are so many aspects you can reach into to find out exactly why he would want the breast milk so bad. I could barely get the ex to test it on his wrist...much less want to take me out shopping in exchange for a refreshing swig.

Oh Craigslist. You may call it crazy, but I call it entertaining. It will either be our future or the downfall of our civilization. I'm betting on the latter.